Joe is in the office with his father, NELSON FOX, and his
grandfather, SCHUYLER FOX. The office has been recently
redecorated; everything is new and a little overdone.
On the wall we see the Foxbooks logo.
JOE - Construction's going well. We should open on time. Although Kevin and I are both a little concerned
about the neighborhood response... (suddenly notices the garish
couch) Hey this fabric on the couch, what is it? Does it have a
name?
NELSON - Money.
JOE - Huh?
NELSON - Its name is money.
JOE - Oh, Gillian selected it.
NELSON - Good guess.
SCHUYLER - Your father's getting married again.
JOE - Really?
SCHUYLER - Yep!
JOE - Congratulations
NELSON - Thank you.
JOE - Why?
NELSON - Who knows?
JOE - Love?
NELSON - Possible.
SCHUYLER - I think you're a damn fool.
NELSON - Pops, Matthew is four years old, okay? It would be nice
for him if he knew his parents were married.
JOE - Listen, I have a sad announcement to make. Uh..City Books... on 23rd Street is going under
...
Nelson, Shuyler, and Joe high-five each other.
NELSON - Oh, Another independent bites the
dust..
SCHUYLER - On to the next.
JOE - You know, I'll buy out their entire inventory of architecture and New York history..for the
new store.
NELSON - How much are your paying?
JOE - Well, whatever it costs, it won't be as much as
this exquisitely uncomfortalbe mohair episode there which is now all over my suit. (indicates the couch)
NELSON - Here you go.
JOE - Thanks. We're also going to have a section dedicated just to writers who've lived on
West Side...
SCHUYLER
- As a sop to the neighborhood.
NELSON - Perfect. Keep those West Side
liberal nuts, pseudo-intellectual...
JOE - Readers, Dad. They're called readers.
NELSON - Don't do that, son, don't romanticize them. It'll keep them
from jumping down your throat...
SCHUYLER - What's the competition?
JOE - One mystery store. Sleuth, on 78th and
Amsterdam. And a children's bookstore, Shop Around the Corner. Been there
forever.
SCHUYLER - Cecilia's store.
JOE - Who's that?
SCHUYLER - Cecilia Kelly, lovely woman. I think we
might have had a date once. Or maybe we
just exchange letters.
JOE - You wrote her letters?
SCHUYLER - Oh, mail. It was called mail.
NELSON
(fondly nostalgic and kidding
it slightly) - Stamps. Envelopes...
JOE - You know, I've heard of it.
SCHUYLER - Cecilia had beautiful penmanship.
She was too young for me, but she was...
enchanting.
JOE - Enchanting?...
SCHUYLER - Her daughter owns it now.
NELSON - Ha, too bad for her.
As a DECORATOR walks into the office carrying a pile of
upholstered pillows, and Joe turns to look at them.
JOE (V.O.) - My father is getting married again. For
five years, he's been living with a woman named Gillian...who studied decorating at Caesar's
Palace.
JOE - Is it porcelain?
NELSON - Rubber.
Kathleen looks up from her book as a butterfly flies through
the subway car.
KATHLEEN (V.O.) - Once I read a story about a butterfly in
the subway, and today...I saw one. It got on at 42nd...and got off at 59th, where I assume it
was going to Bloomindale's...to buy a hat
that will turn out to be a mistake. As
almost all hats are.
EXT. H & H BAGELS - NIGHT
A flour truck is unloading flour into a hole in the ground.
JOE (V.O.) - Listen to this: Every night a truck
pulls up to my neighborhood bagel place...and pumps about a
ton of flour into the ground tanks? Then the air is filled....with white dust which never seems to land. Why is that?
As Joe comes around the corner and sees the dust filling the
air. It is amazing.
KATHLEEN (V.O.) - Confession: I've read Pride & Prejudice about 200 times...I get lost in the language.
INT. JOE'S KITCHEN - DAY
As Joe reads a copy of Pride and Prejudice. He can't stand
it.
KATHLEEN (V.O.) - Words like.."thither".."Mischance".."Felicity"..and I'm always in agony over whether Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy are really going to
get together...Uh, read it. I know you'll love it.
EXT. STARBUCKS - DAY
EXT. STARBUCKS - DAY
As Joe leaves with his morning coffee.
She enters Starbucks.
As Kathleen buys her morning coffee and listens to everyone
ordering.
We can hear the sounds of Starbucks: "Short decaf cap," "Tall
mocha latte." "Grande lowfat regular." Etc.
JOE (V.O.) - The whole purpose of places like Starbucks...is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever...to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee.caf, decaf...low-fat, nonfat...et cetera.
CLERK - Mocha frappuccino grande.
JOE (V.O.) -So people who don't know what the hell they're doing...or who on earth they are can, for only $ 2.95...get not just a cup of coffee...but an absolutely defining sense of self. Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino!
CUSTOMER (in front of KATHLEEN in Starbucks) - Tall decaf cappuccino.
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